I wondered if I would make it through yesterday - tough day, especially for my husband, I was a bitch. Today so far feels better but I do not want to get to ahead of myself, it is still early in the day.
I sure do not feel that "I do not want a cigarette, do not want to smoke" feeling that so many people on Chantix feel - I wish I did but then again I knew this was not going to be a walk in the park.
I still cannot help but feel that what I feel is the breaking of 35-36 year old habits, the kind I did over and over again 20x a day for 35-36 years. I am trying to let go of something that is probably as ingrained into me as my personality. This makes it more important to me to get rid of this "demon", I find it hard to believe I allowed anything to take this strong a hold over my life - I have never let anyone or anything do this to me and now to find that I gave it to cigarettes disgusts me.
I do feel better physically and I think I look better too, there is not longer that dingy look to my face and I find my nails are no longer yellowing and of course I smell better.
Again, I quit a day at a time and today I will not smoke, no cigarettes for me.
Monday, October 1, 2007
Day 6 - No Cigarettes
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2 COMMENTS:
I completely understand what you are saying. I think that we are two peas in a pod. :)
My daughter noticed the change in my skin color right away and the wrinkles above my upper lip are not as severe as they were. That's all good.
Just keep going, you're doing great! I know that it's hard and I enjoyed reading your post because even with the Chantix it was hard for me too. If I can do it, you can too!
Way to go...tomorrow will be a week! Woo Hoo!!!! That will be huge!!!!!
MamaFlo, I understand completely. I've blogged about the exact same thing, that I smoked for 20+ years, and it didn't get easy over night, even with Chantix. Thankfully, the Chantix did help tremendously, but it still required my full cooperation, and it wasn't always easy. There are some who do have an easier time, and I'd say I wasn't one of those. Still, I can tell you that overall it did, indeed, get easier, even with some tougher days in between, and each time I wanted to smoke - really, really wanted to smoke - but didn't, I came through the other side stronger and more confident and more determined (as if I'm not already stubborn enough as is!). You are 6 days in, and that's far enough along not to want to start over, so I believe that you are right that you will not smoke today. All you have to do is make it until bedtime, and you already know that you can do it because you already have been. One day at a time. That's it. You've got it nailed, MamaFlo, so just keep right on going!
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