The weather is playing flip-flop again, what a 12 month span this has been, going through every conceivable variation of what the weather could possibly be. I know the entire country, no make that world has been through the same. I think we better heed Mother Nature or she's gonna shake us the hell right off the planet.
Oh yeah, this blog is about my struggle with Quitting Smoking........another day without a cigarette but those there tuggings are just a wee bit stronger than they were last week but hey, this cannot be physical anymore, this has to be psychological and it has to be that I'm thinking about not taking the Chantix anymore (as it shouldn't matter going from half a tablet to nothing). I've made so many changes since I quit smoking like not really drinking coffee anymore (went from about 4 pots a day down to half a cup), as I've lamented before.....I just don't enjoy the coffee without the cigarettes, sooooooooo, and I quit biting my nails (yes I was one of those neurotic people that was biting her nails when she wasn't smoking - OMG)!!!!! Then of course there is my quest to get healthy by eating better (the exercise will come later when the doctor says my carotid arteries are doing better) - don't read into this that I'm overweight cause I'm not, luckily I've never had to battle weight and I could eat anything I wanted but of course eating anything I wanted was horrible for my heart and arteries. Then of course there was the change in wardrobe that happened earlier this winter after my sister came to visit and with her and my daughter we went shopping and I felt like a fish out of water - I dislike shopping and I've fallen behind in fashion (I didn't own a single pair of denim pants but instead I love Lands End sport knits), anyway I also wasn't a make-up wearer (more of the tom-boy type) and they make me feel so bad about myself that after my sister left, I went on a shopping spree for denim and make-up and now I'm poorer but I'm more fashionable - hahaahaaaa.
Anyway, I would really like to stop making more changes for awhile and instead settle into this new life I've created for myself and simply get used to not smoking and not eating the things I enjoy, while struggling to hold onto that icky food with these long nails so the food doesn't land on these denim jeans. Oh what a tangled web we weave.
This is all "almost" enough to make me reach for a cigarette! Hahahahaa
I hope everyone out there is staying with their quit and making the changes necessary to love their new smoke free life!
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Monday, January 28, 2008
I have a couple thoughts running through this empty head of mine..........
FIRST - I've found a new way to dismiss the tuggings (we live in a military community) and everywhere we go I see a service member without a limb or one that has been badly burned.......my God, if they can endure that, I can certainly endure the psychological effects of quitting smoking.
SECOND - I have quit taking Chantix - Yipppeee!!! Not that I was having side effects (since I was down to half a tablet a day) but because I don't have to spend that money on the Chantix or the Cigarettes every month (my insurance didn't pay a penny of the Chantix).
THIRD - I can't even imagine smoking the 2,500+ cigarettes my ticker says I've done without since I quit, it's just so depressing to think that I was so controlled by a thing.
I'm really happy that I've given myself this tremendous gift of Quit.
I hope all of you contine to give Quit to yourself.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
We're at the home of my son and DIL in Houston and having a very nice visit.
Had a scare driving here yesterday - we were heading down I-10, driving about 80 with on and off rain, periodically wet highway, well, I was in the left lane and all of a sudden I lost total control of the car (BMW 540), spun every which way and unfortuanately never lost speed (which probably kept the 18 wheeler behind us from hitting us), eventually, the car spun sideways and off the road partly off the road. Scarry doesn't even come close to how my husband and I felt. No damage to the car and we were able to (change drivers of course) and get back on the road.
Our DIL was Dx with pre-eclampsia so she is on bedrest and her OB is planning on delivering our GrandSon at 36 weeks (still about 4.5 weeks away).
We'll be headed back home tomorrow but hopefully on bone dry roads.
Did I smoke - No I Did Not and I'm thrilled!
Today is my last day on Chantix but I'm not pitching what I have left and I'm not getting rid of the one refill I still have left............I started on Chantix near mid September.
Hope everyone's weekend has been as good (or better) than mine and that all of you are still smoke free.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Still going strong on not smoking and ready to stop the half tablet of Chantix I'm currently taking (probably isn't doing diddly anyway).
My DIL found out yesterday that she has pre-eclampsia and her OB wants to induce at 36 weeks which means the end of February or first few days of March - baby is fine and is about 4 lbs, 4 oz. and still has time to grow - Grow Rudy, Grow!!!
Thanks everyone for all your support! I really couldn't do this without you all.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Hi everyone! Sorry its been awhile since I've posted. No, I'm not smoking again, thank God for that. I'm still taking a half Chantix daily (morning) and doing okay with it. I've had some tuggings lately but they have to do with a couple different triggers - the cold weather (wanting coffee and thus a cigarette), busy doing techie stuff (always frustrating and makes me want to take a smoke break), and well just not having anything to say.
The eating more healthy is doing me good, lost 6 pounds already (husband lost 5) but I'm always wanting my favorite treat - Baskin Robbins Jamoca Almond Fudge icecream. I haven't had any but think about the taste everyday - hahaha
I'm getting frustrated with all the reruns of my favorite TV shows due to the writers strike!
I need to get back into the swing of things and start reading everyone's blogs so I have a focal point..............
Here's to hoping everyone is still Quit.
Thanks Everybody for being there for me!!!
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
I was out and about today and when I was ready to start back home, I pulled around the parking lot to find a starbucks and I pulled up in front and watched and smelled and thought about wanting a cigarette - damn, I pulled out of the parking lot so fast I almost took wings! I thought about my last post about cutting my coffee consumption since I quit smoking...........as much as I'd love a Venti Caramel Macchiato, extra caramel with 2 raw sugars, I don't want to smoke and it will be awhile until I can enjoy one without the association.
Otherwise I'm doing great still and I'm so proud of this personal accomplishment, I quit smoking almost 4 months ago!! Yipppeeee!!!!!
Monday, January 14, 2008
I'm down to a half tablet of Chantix daily and could probably go witout entirely but I'll do this for 2 weeks and make sure feeling this good isn't just a good run and will end (it better not). Most of the time I don't even think about smoking anymore, urges periodically rear their head but I do a couple deep breathing exercises and whallla, the urge is gone.
Did anyone else cut back or change their coffee drinking when they quit smoking? I loved coffee while I was smoking, not so much so off the smokes.
I quit spending so much time outside......I spent alot of time outside while I smoked because I hadn't smoked in the house in the last five years.
What else has changed in your life since you quit smoking?
Friday, January 11, 2008
Here it is Friday night and it's been the best week since I quit smoking! On Sunday I come down to half a tablet of Chantix daily and I can hardly wait! I want to come off the Chantix just because I don't like taking more medication than absolutely necessary. I'm in no big hurry as I don't want to go back to smoking (at any cost) but I need to keep weening myself off Chantix. I will forever be grateful to this drug as it worked wonders for me - I never thought I'd really be able to quit smoking.
I know other quitters out there are far ahead of me but I'm racing to catch you just as quick as I can!!!
Thank you for all your encouragement everyone (experienced and newbies alike)!
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
I'm almost ashamed to say that I'm feeling better and more confident everyday! I'm only on one Chantix a day right now and I'm wondering if that's what's helping my spirits lift or if it could just be that I'm actually feeling great about not smoking anymore.
Sunday, January 6, 2008
I don't know why but 2008 has started out feeling real good. I'm really not wanting to smoke, I'm watching the type of food I'm putting in my and my husband's mouths trying to get us healthier, the house is decluttering a little more everyday............Wow, how wonderful!!!
I've even got our next cruise booked, a 10 night Ultimate Caribbean in November - it's a ways away but it's a great trip to look forward to.
The first few months of this year will be spent clearing out more clutter and making some home improvements. I've recently come to reappreciate my home more.
My entire frame of mind feels different this year and without smoking - Yipppeee, I hope this means that the worst is over.
I hope everyone has had a wonderful weekend and has managed to stay quit.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Seems that lately I've been feeling much better about not smoking, urges aren't as bad and don't last near as long. I've been trying the deep breathing techniques, eating more sensibly, and staying busier - could that be the key?
I have started to again taper off my Chantix - I'm currently taking the 1mg tab mid morning with nothing at night. If it's true that after 12 days of not smoking the Chantix doesn't help (just don't know if I can believe that), then I'm wasting my moolah which could be better spent for a gym membership.
I'm wanting to take a trip to Vegas in May and I want to be able to go and have the same good time I've always had but this time without cigarettes - is that possible? I love the slot machines and I've never been much of a drinker. I'd love to go to Vegas and spend less time in front of a slot machine, more time enjoying good meals and a great room and great pool area.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
I've tried without success to find the answer to this on blogger and the general internet so I'll turn to the people that have helped me overcome an issue far greater than this one.............
I've seen that some posters have their photo that posts next to their posts on other people's blogs.........how in the world do you do that???
Your help will be appreciated - thank you!!
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
I can hardly believe that another year is in the past..........where is time going and why do I keep looking younger? Hahaha
I never thought that I would celebrate the holidays without smoking after all these years but I did and I'm so proud of myself (and all my ex-smoking friends)!!
I'm hoping that 2008 will bring me continued improving health, that I can start a rigorous exercising program, can loose a few pounds, firm up what's already there, and add some years to my life.
I vow not to smoke "today", one day at a time I will make this a forever thing.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!